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How Can I Stop From Spouse From Cheating On Me In Retaliation?
I heard from a wife who said: “when I had a drunken fling with an old boyfriend, I immediately confessed to my husband because I didn’t want anything to destroy my marriage. I have repeatedly apologized and have been a good wife ever since. But the other day, I was looking my husband’s Facebook account and I noticed he had a lot of flirtatious emails from women from his old home town. I finally broke down and asked him why he was carrying on with these women. He very calmly told me that he felt it was his right to experiment with other women if he felt like it. He told me that he could cheat with one of them and I would have no right to become angry about it. I then asked him if he was trying to have an affair. He told me that maybe he was. What can I do to make him understand that cheating on me isn’t the answer?”
If I Go To Counseling With My Cheating Spouse, Am I Condoning The Cheating?I heard from a wife who said: “when I found out about my husband’s affair, I told him very directly that I was going to need a lot of time in order to determine how I wanted to proceed. I didn’t kick him out, but I didn’t agree to stay in our marriage either. So I told him that he could continue living with me and our kids while I took my time evaluating what I wanted to do. Honestly, I thought that I might watch his behaviors and see how he was acting toward me and combine those observations with my own feelings in order to make a decision. Well, apparently, this process isn’t fast enough for my husband. He has started contacting and interviewing counselors. He is pushing for me to go to counseling with him and I’m not sure that I am ready for that. I worry that if I agree to go to counseling, this will almost be like condoning the affair and it is almost like me saying I’m willing to work with him to save our marriage. And I don’t know want to give either impression. What do you think?”
